I love words...

I love words so much, that I'd eat them if I could. Isn't there a famous quote about that? I know I read it somewhere before... Hmmmm.... Must try to find it.

As a supervisor to 20+ staff, I try to share inspirational and positive quotes with the team a few times a week, in an effort to curb the Negative Nellies who continually spread doom and gloom and gossip throughout our already overworked department...

I like this quote a lot...so I am posting and sharing it here.

"Your life is always a product of your thoughts. Happiness does not arrive when you achieve certain things; it comes when you think certain thoughts and feel certain feelings. Happiness is nothing more than a state of mind that you create by the way that you process and interpret the events of your life. Whatever story you tell, whether good or bad, will be the story of your life. Give judgment and criticism, and you give it to yourself. Give love and appreciation to another person or anything, and you give it to yourself. So start telling the story of your amazing life, and enjoy the results."



- Lisa Scott
 
I don't make the rules, this is just the way the Universe works, dude...

Have a super awesome day!

Thank you McDonald's?

Have I mentioned how much I LOVE my new condo? I am across the street from my favourite grocery store Farm Boy, close to other faves like HomeSense and Winners, within walking distance to my dentist, laser hair removal salon - Hummingbird MediSpa, and sadly.... McDonald's.

Trust me, there was I time when this would have THRILLED ME!!! You don't grow to size 26 without swallowing up your fair share of food from McDonald's and other fast food champions. Although unlike the numerous people who have unsuccessfully tried to sue McDonald's for their weight gain, I accept full responsibility for every bite of food I ever ate from there.

I loved it! It was fast, easy, relatively tasty...we grew up on that stuff! I mean, who wouldn't love it? But you know what else it was? Anonymous. All drive-thru's are a closet eaters DREAM.

I was walking to my laser hair removal appointment yesterday, and because it was so flipping cold out, I cut through the McDonald's parking lot to get there faster. I saw 2 drive-thru patrons who stuck out at me. Why? Because they reminded me of the old me.

In all fairness, I realize that I don't know the personal stories of these people, but they really did look an awful lot like I did 100 lbs ago...

Alone. In their car. Pulled over after paying at the window. Hoping nobody saw them there. Shoveling food in hand over fist - literally. Just your standard sort of chew-3-or-4-times, swallow-and-hope-for-the-best kind of eating.

And they were both about the size I used to be. Or bigger.
One man. One woman. Separate cars.

From where I stood, they looked sad. And from what I recall of those similar times in my life, there is a high chance that they had both just gotten off work for the day, and they were heading home to their family for dinner... "but before I go home, maybe I'll just stop for a snack."

And before you know it, you find yourself sitting in your 1999 2-door, 5-speed Honda Civic, with a large Diet Coke (because diet coke somehow balances out the rest of the meal, right?) in the cup holder, 10 "chicken" nuggets in the styrofoam container, and a super size fries in the flipped up lid of that container. And 1200 calories later, all feelings shoved back down, all evidence thrown away in the convenient parking lot trash cans, face and hands wiped clean, you head home for supper/out with friends/to the movies, etc.... where there will surely be more food.

It made me sad for the old me, and it made me sad for the two people I was watching.

I started to think back to the times that I stuffed my feelings of sadness, hurt, anger away with food. I now know that I was abandoning myself and my truest potential and happiness. Yes, Every. Single. Time.

I am reading a book right now that suggests that every time we abandon ourselves for food, alcohol, drugs, sex, smoking... every time we don't take care of ourselves to the best of our abilities by getting annual pap smears, prostate exams, flossing... What about when we take back an ex who cheated after we promised ourselves we wouldn't? Or every time we settle for less than we know we deserve?
We are limiting our growth. And our deepest potential happiness.

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About *Ex isn't just about our ex's as much as it is about our inability to let go of those horrifying fears we have of being abandoned.

Face them. Overcome them. Live a better life. I'm living proof.

Anyways, McDonald's made me think yesterday. And I haven't stopped since. So for that, I guess I have to thank them...I just can't support them. Anymore.

Have a seriously AWESOME DAY!!!

Disclaimer: **For all the McDonald's lovers out there, trust me, it's not just Mickey D's I'm referring to - they just happen to be the biggest player in the game, so they take the brunt of society's displeasure with what they represent and for what they have done and keep doing to the world. I also choose not to frequent other fast food joints such as Wendy's, Burger King, KFC, etc....

If you don't ask, you won't know.

Is ignorance really that blissful? Do the people who "don't know any better" really live happier lives? Take me for example, I'm pretty freaking blissful, although I am without post-secondary education - unless Beauty School counts? - and I am wide awake behind the wheel of life.

I sometimes drive myself a little bit insane with the constant self-evaluation, occasional worry that I am not doing enough, giving enough, or being enough to those around me...
And on the proverbial flipped coin? I feel terribly off balance when I am giving too much of myself and my time away to others. When that happens, you will surely have to go searching for me, because I've gone into hibernation mode...

I was just reading a fabulous thought-provoking article that Oprah sent me, and I think you should click here and read it, too...

One of my favourite segments of this article is this: What potential memories am I bartering, and is the profit worth the price?
I once read a story about a world where people sold memories the way we can sell plasma. The protagonist was an addict who'd pawned many memories for drugs but had sworn never to sell his memory of falling in love. His addiction won. Afterward he was unaware of his loss, lacking the memory he'd sold. But for the reader, the trade-off was ghastly to contemplate. Every time you choose social acceptance over your heart's desires, or financial gain over ethics, or your comfort zone over the adventure you were born to experience, you're making a similar deal. Don't.

Or maybe this: "To become learned, each day add something. To become enlightened, each day drop something." 

Have an AWESOME day!!!

Not resolutions. Goals.

Well, I haven't really worked out in about 4 months - due largely in part to my stupid back issues, as well as a trip home to Newfoundland, a hideous allergic reaction to medication prescribed by my doctor, out of town guests, work, and Christmas.

But now I'm back.

I have quite literally done everything I possible can to help eliminate the chance of these back issues resurfacing in future by getting a new bed, and going to acupuncture, chiropractor, physiotherapist and a massage therapist - which I will continue to go to monthly. I have had 2 (yes, 2) ergonomic assessments done at work, and been given a new chair and desk set-up. And lastly, I went to have my gait assessed by Ryan Grant, who suggested new shoes with moderate support, which I have also gone and purchased.
(side note: I believe we should all go get our feet looked at, so we can truck along on the best possible foundation for our bodies)

And so now it's time to start running again.

Loosely, my goals are as follows:

-To be able to run a comfortable 7km before my 10km Running Room clinic starts in March
-To complete a full 10km comfortably in sets of 9 minute runs and 1 minute walks by May
-To work on my time and be able to finish in less than 70 minutes
-Run the race on May 28th, and drop as many of those 1 minute walks as I can

Some other unrelated-to-running goals are as follows:
-I want to be able to chest press 50lb dumbbells - that's 100lbs, dude!
-At some point, I'd like to be able to do 25 consecutive toe push ups without it killing me
-I currently hate static lunges because they hurt. I want them to not hurt anymore.
-I would like to perfect the pose shown above - Dancer Pose.
-Reach my final weight goal by August 13th
-Do a Try-A-Tri or a Duathalon with Feather and anyone else who wants to come
-I'd like to hold plank position for 1 minute and 30 seconds

That's it for now... but it's definitely time to start thinking about your goals, too...

I hope that you are having an awesome day!!!

'Yes' Woman.

I did it. So did Feather. So did Dolce. We have gone ahead and signed up for the 10km NCC Ottawa Race Weekend in May 2011.   (the above route is from 2009, but they don't tend to change much)

So that is twice as long as we have ever trained for, and we have about 20 weeks to prepare.

Keep in mind that neither of us have done much running since the Great 5km Army Run of 2010, so we have lots of work to do to get ready for this race. It's time to get a plan in place, a training schedule, and maybe join a 10km class at The Running Room in March.

I'm scared. And it's all my own pressure and fears here. Without a doubt, I know that I can move my body 10km - whether it be walking or running - I know that I can do that part of it. But just like when I signed up for the 5km last year, I don't know how WELL I can do it. And I want to do it upright, smiling and comfortably.

The self-induced pressure comes from wanting to finish in a chosen time frame. I am afraid that I will be disappointed with myself if I don't.

I set my goal to finish the 10km in 60 - 70 minutes. That is slooooooow by many people's standards, but certainly faster and longer than I have ever done it before.
Yes, it's my race, and yes, I will run comfortably at my own pace in my new shoes.
I just set the bar at 70 minutes and now I have something to work towards and hopefully better.

The lessons that keep popping up along this journey are amazing to me. And most of them seem to have the same message built in - Be Brave. And to Believe in Myself, My Ability, My Worth.

It's pretty insane how much we let fear hold us back. Fear of failure, and especially backwards? Fear of success.

I am going to try and make 2011 - now officially known as 20-AWESOME because it IS going to be AWESOME - as fearless as possible. Each time my mind tells me 'no', I am going to try and make a conscious effort to switch it to a 'yes' and see what kind of year I can make for myself. I am going to be brave and ask for what I need, say what I feel, run my own race, and overcome these fears with a roaring "YES".

I hope that you are having an awesome day!

Honour what is inside you...

Who wouldn't want to be a Goddess? Or a God? Worshipped, honoured, loved.
But since I wasn't born in the 15th Century, I will happily settle for being a modern day Goddess.
If only in my own mind.

My wise and incredibly supportive friend Weezie, just sent me this article about how to honour the God or Goddess within each of us... check it out if you feel like you need to be gently pushed back on the right path towards your very best life.

I believe in this message. I believe in me. And I know that I am on the right path. Hell, this is the very best path I have ever been on in my whole life!

So all the worry, self-doubt and stupid limiting beliefs that I have been feeling lately? Well, they are passing. They will pass entirely, and I will keep on trucking towards the light, the love, and the life that I want for myself.

When you are on the right track, and living The Life that you want for yourself the right person will slip in beside you, keep up with you, and inspire you.

It's like I just told my 2 friends E and Harmony last night, "It isn't mandatory that I find someone who will bike 80kms alongside me, but I would definitely like him to be waiting at the finish line with hugs, kisses, pride and a snack."

I hope that you are having an AWESOME day! Honour the God or Goddess within you.

The Golden Rule.

Here's the deal. I know innumerable amazing women. I mean it. AMAZING. WOMEN. Self-assured, confident, intelligent, funny, beautiful, glass-half-full, strong, independant, fun, dog-loving, social, bring-home-to-mom, introduce to your buddies, financially stable, gainfully employed, well read, well spoken, lady-in-the-streets-freak-in-the-sheets, kind of girls.

And men keep passing them (us) by, taking them (us) for granted, giving them (us) up, lying to them (us) and letting them (us) down.

To be clear - in case it wasn't obvious - I believe myself to be included in the awesome and fantastic group called "them".

Is it that these men see how fabulous we are, and they are intimidated by us? Do they not know what to do with a truly nice, sane, stable girl who has goals and will accomplish them?
Is that what it is? Really? If it is, this astounds me. Seriously, it leaves me baffled. Or maybe it says more about the man than I really ever could... hmmmmm....food for thought.

I think about men like Oprah's Stedman - Jesus, he must be some helluva man. Here is this incredibly powerful woman, who despite all appearances still has her own demons and battles to fight, I'm sure.
Same as we all do. And just like the rest of us, we want someone by our side while we kick our way through the trenches.

Who doesn't want to love, and be loved in return? Aren't we all looking for that? Wouldn't the world be a better place with more love? And more love letters while we are at it?
And I'll tell you what else... The world would definitely be a better place if we were more respectful, honest, and if we all treated others the way we would want to be treated ourselves.
Gentlemen, none of you like the token "crazy chick", right!?!
Then how about applying The Golden Rule?
Now, I know that wasn't Rocket Science, but let's elaborate for shits and giggles, shall we?

If you no longer want to date a girl? Grow some balls and tell her so. Not via text. Not via email. Phone call, at a minimum. Be a big boy and call her up. Don't forget the cardinal rule boys. Be honest. You have no control over how she handles it, but I can promise you this - if you don't handle it right from the get-go? You're asking for trouble. Anything from a drive-by spying session, to a full blown bunny boiling. You did it to yourself. Own that. Learn from it. Move on. And for the love of God, don't leave another woman out in no-man's land like that again. It's frigging rude.

If something she does annoys you? Grow a pair and tell her so. "Baby, it really grosses me out when you pick your teeth with your fingernails." or "I really like the way your hair smells when it is freshly washed. It's much nicer than when you don't wash it for 5 days."

If you want sex, and she isn't giving it up yet? Grow a pair and discuss it with her openly. "We have been seeing each other for awhile now, and we have done almost everything else. I'd really like to have sex with you, and while I can't promise where we will go after that, I know I want to experience you in that way."

Whatever the case, whatever the reason, just don't be a jerk. That simply isn't nice, and it isn't okay to treat other people poorly. Karma will come back to bite you in the ass eventually. It always does.

I am still trying to figure out what it was about the Christmas Day Dumping that upset me as much as it did, which is how you got so lucky to have to read about it three times over now... But the loud and clear message that keeps ringing in my ears as said by my handsome friend, ZenSoul, is the same rule we were all taught in 2nd Grade. The Golden Rule.

And I can tell you this...without a doubt in my mind...I ultimately want to be with someone who will treat me as well as I will treat him. Everyone else can go find new friends to play with, because that's just the beginning of what I truly deserve.

I hope that you are having an awesome day!!!

Making myself accountable.

I have made an important decision regarding the next phase of my weight loss journey that I am going to share with you all. And by 'all', I realize that I may only be referring to 10 or 12 people.

The first 100lb leg was a success for an incredible number of reasons, not least of which was me making myself accountable to so many people around me.

With everything that I have had going on for the past 4 months - selling a house, buying a condo, packing, moving, throwing my back out for 11 weeks, an allergic reaction to medication, a trip to Newfoundland and some personal drama that I have since blogged about and/or washed my hands of - I am very happy to say that I have maintained my weight within the same 6 pounds that I keep bouncing around.

Now that my back has finally healed and I am back to seeing Trainer Mike 2x a week, I will be making a serious effort to also get back to my old routine of scheduling in cardio 3 - 4x per week as well.

I am in the process of creating a list of goals for 2010, such as running the 10km on National Capital Race Weekend and the 80km MS Ride from Ottawa to Kemptville. Except that this year, I am going to do the 2 day tour - 80 km out on Saturday, and 65 km back on Sunday.

The whole point of today's blog is this though - I am pledging my goal to lose my last 50 pounds by August 13th of this year.

Having a timeline, what I hope is a realistic goal, and being armed with the tools that I have at my disposal, I feel that August 13th is the perfect date to aim for.

It's the anniversary of my first day in 2009 when I stepped on the scale and made the commitment to change my life. And it is my 1 year anniversary for having lost 101 lbs and hosting my Pants Burning Party.

I am giving a big shout out to my closest, most supportive, knowledge-sharing friends and Trainer Mike here, because you are all going to be with me every step of the way - literally in some cases and figuratively in the rest. Without all of you believing in me, working beside me, and pushing me to be better and do better, I am quite certain that I would still be stuck behind some ridiculous old limiting beliefs about myself.

I am grateful beyond measure to be as loved, lifted and surrounded as I am.

And I can only hope that I do for you what you so generously do for me.

Have an awesome day everyone!